Last month Jason and I made the decision to plan for a home birth, and we found our amazing midwife pretty quickly. Amrit Khalsa is well-known in the Bay Area midwifery scene (a bigger scene than you may think. Actually, you're probably not surprised that the Bay has a big midwife scene) and she worked with three acquaintances who gave birth last year; they all had very different birth experiences, and not all were smooth sailing by any means, and they all heartily recommended Amrit. Knowing that she was more than capable in these three dramatically different birthing scenarios is really great to know. But more importantly than the recs and all the accolades on the Berkeley Parents Network is the fact that Jason and I adored Amrit immediately upon meeting her. We sealed the deal during our first meeting, and were so excited for our first visit with her.
I have always been interested in midwifery, but until now haven't known exactly how the whole deal works. I'm learning a ton, and one of the most compelling aspects is that the midwife does all of the prenatal visits, and generally does them in your home (some midwives have offices, but most do home visits). Visits last around 2 hours, and are incredibly holistic and comprehensive; basics like blood pressure, baby heartbeat, and uterus size are checked, and the rest of the appointment is about the midwife getting to know you and your partner. Amazing. It's the kind of medical care that I have always longed for---I'm so sick of the 10-minute doctor visit (which is, by the way, what my OB prenatal visits are. 10 minutes of heartbeat, feel the uterus, blood pressure, weight, ask how you're doing, bye). I will soon tell my OB that I am planning a home birth, and we will then cease our doctor-patient relationship, for now, because in California it's illegal for an OB to work with you if you're working concurrently with a midwife and planning a home birth. Why? Malpractice of course! One downside to this is that, if a home birth mama ends up needing or desiring a hospital transfer, she most likely ends up with a doctor she doesn't know, who may or may not be down with the accompanying midwife, and who may or may not be a crappy doctor. As I've made clear and will continue to make clear, I'm not anti-hospital, but I do believe there are less-than awesome doctors out there, just as I believe there are compassionate, sensitive, woman-friendly doctors---and to not know which you'll end up with is not ideal. One major awesome point about Amrit is that she does have a relationship with an OB who is on call for all her births; thus, if I end up transferring to the hospital near my house, I would know the attending doctor.
Anyway. The first visit was wonderful---I made us tea and breakfast, the pets hung around and watched, and I even got to pee on a stick to test my pH levels. In my own bathroom! It's incredible how different a medical experience is in your own home vs. a doctor's office. I like my doctor's office very much, but the entire power doctor-patient power dynamic shifts in an amazing way when you're in your own home, on the couch, drinking tea and talking. Not sitting on that stiff crinkly paper, not under florescent lights, not feeling awkward or weird or worried about keeping your busy doctor too long with all your annoying, irrational questions...
I had emailed Amrit about my not-feeling-the-baby concerns, and she left me a great message in response, saying exactly what I figured she'd say (which is exactly what I wanted to hear). When she arrived she was like "Let's listen to this baby right away so you know it's ok!"
And so here we are, on the couch, listening to our baby's loud kick-ass heartbeat. The last time we heard it was around 12 weeks, and it was way more whoooosh whoooosh whooooosh. Now's it's like ka-thunk ka-thunk ka-thunk HEARTBEAT! You also get a nice taste of Amrit's vibe, which is the perfect balance of warm earth mama and super knowledgeable baby expert...
I have always been interested in midwifery, but until now haven't known exactly how the whole deal works. I'm learning a ton, and one of the most compelling aspects is that the midwife does all of the prenatal visits, and generally does them in your home (some midwives have offices, but most do home visits). Visits last around 2 hours, and are incredibly holistic and comprehensive; basics like blood pressure, baby heartbeat, and uterus size are checked, and the rest of the appointment is about the midwife getting to know you and your partner. Amazing. It's the kind of medical care that I have always longed for---I'm so sick of the 10-minute doctor visit (which is, by the way, what my OB prenatal visits are. 10 minutes of heartbeat, feel the uterus, blood pressure, weight, ask how you're doing, bye). I will soon tell my OB that I am planning a home birth, and we will then cease our doctor-patient relationship, for now, because in California it's illegal for an OB to work with you if you're working concurrently with a midwife and planning a home birth. Why? Malpractice of course! One downside to this is that, if a home birth mama ends up needing or desiring a hospital transfer, she most likely ends up with a doctor she doesn't know, who may or may not be down with the accompanying midwife, and who may or may not be a crappy doctor. As I've made clear and will continue to make clear, I'm not anti-hospital, but I do believe there are less-than awesome doctors out there, just as I believe there are compassionate, sensitive, woman-friendly doctors---and to not know which you'll end up with is not ideal. One major awesome point about Amrit is that she does have a relationship with an OB who is on call for all her births; thus, if I end up transferring to the hospital near my house, I would know the attending doctor.
Anyway. The first visit was wonderful---I made us tea and breakfast, the pets hung around and watched, and I even got to pee on a stick to test my pH levels. In my own bathroom! It's incredible how different a medical experience is in your own home vs. a doctor's office. I like my doctor's office very much, but the entire power doctor-patient power dynamic shifts in an amazing way when you're in your own home, on the couch, drinking tea and talking. Not sitting on that stiff crinkly paper, not under florescent lights, not feeling awkward or weird or worried about keeping your busy doctor too long with all your annoying, irrational questions...
I had emailed Amrit about my not-feeling-the-baby concerns, and she left me a great message in response, saying exactly what I figured she'd say (which is exactly what I wanted to hear). When she arrived she was like "Let's listen to this baby right away so you know it's ok!"
And so here we are, on the couch, listening to our baby's loud kick-ass heartbeat. The last time we heard it was around 12 weeks, and it was way more whoooosh whoooosh whooooosh. Now's it's like ka-thunk ka-thunk ka-thunk HEARTBEAT! You also get a nice taste of Amrit's vibe, which is the perfect balance of warm earth mama and super knowledgeable baby expert...
2 comments:
Very exciting. My mom had me at home, and one of the coolest things about my baby book is an envelope with "birth stories"--narratives written by my mom, my dad, my grandma (mom's mom, who cooked food and fetched water etc.), my mom's best friend (who is a physical therapist & did some massage work during the birth), and the midwife. They all described their very interesting, and very different, experiences--using different language, focusing on different parts of the night, etc.
Congratulations, Kate, and thanks for writing about your experiences--it's fun and interesting to read.
This is amazing. So happy for you! <3
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